It’s possibly different to what you think!
In my 4+ years of life coaching to date since I qualified, I've not spoken explicitly about accountability before so I thought it was about time!
What do we mean by accountability?
Something along the lines of having ownership and responsibility for our decisions and actions (and therefore the direction we are heading in, even if there are bumps in the road!)
Some of us, me included, might have circumvented thinking about this topic in detail because in my mind, I am really responsible for the above, so what else is there to dive into? Turns out, quite a bit! So instead of brushing it aside completely, as I did, let’s start with a question:
What’s your relationship with personal accountability?
E.g.
· Do you like to be left to your own devices / play things by ear and adjust as you go?
· Do you like systems, reminders, rewards?
· Do you maybe let yourself off the hook sometimes?
· Do you find telling someone or having an 'accountability buddy' helps?
· Can you separate accountability from blame (blame being pretty unhelpful in my view!)
This is where things can get interesting! A couple of things have come to mind about this:
- We often think about accountability in terms of work output, i.e. what we get paid for
- How we feel about accountability may be very different if we are employed (and therefore have a manager / company to feel accountable to) or if we are self-employed – in which case it may be just to ourselves, or sometimes to our clients and / or business partners. Most of don’t like to feel like we are ‘letting others down’ – but sometimes this can be at a personal cost too.
Just as I am a ‘life’ coach, and therefore am a big fan of looking at things in totality / in the round, I think this is a good tactic when thinking about accountability too, even if it all gets a bit messy! After all, life isn’t always straight forward is it?!
Accountable – to who and for what?!
I think every individual’s answer to this may look different – and that’s OK. What I would encourage though, is that accountability doesn’t just start and finish in relation to work-related things. I think work is where accountability is likely to make itself known, one way or another: when we have a manager, we don’t really get a say! (Here the important part is perhaps the relationship to manage the accountability rather than the accountability bit itself).
Many of us who are self-employed have accountability buddies for the very reason that when it comes to the non-client facing accountability, and where we could easily get distracted, or fall adrift on our goals, an accountability buddy can help us stay on track.
I’d add another dimension to this however… choosing what to be accountable for in the first place. What if all we see is all there is?! A coach helps you to see the wood for the trees and expand the options of what you may be personally accountable for.
Accountability isn’t just set a goal, break it down in to manageable chunks and tasks and then check in to see your progress (all of which is very valid) but – what about determining what that goal may be, personally or professionally, in the first place?
If this isn’t well-thought through then we can end up being accountable for what doesn’t really matter – an avenue we don’t really want to pursue!
Not being accountable - letting yourself off the hook
Time to address the possible elephant in the room – and no judgement here! And this isn’t about igniting the blame game – that’s not something we want to get involved in! But I think I have to say it – when there’s something you aren’t getting around to (i.e. not keeping yourself accountable for) whether it’s personal or professional, it is worth examining why that is:
- Is it because we don’t want to let others down before ourselves (meaning this thing continually drops down the priority list and doesn’t get a look in?)
- Is it because our heart just isn’t in it? (We don’t really want to do it so we let it slide or we think it is something we should do but really there is a mismatch with what we really want?)
- Is it because avoiding it (procrastinating!) means we get to avoid the possibility of it going wrong? Or going right and what that may mean too? Our brains like to keep us safe – but it’s worth thinking about what from really, the answer might be revealing!
Moving forward with accountability working for you
Just as life doesn’t tend to offer us a smooth path the whole way in a direction we expected it to, I think our relationship with accountability is much the same – chances are there is a lot going on underneath what we feel responsible for (including sometimes too much) and the ownership we are willing to take over our lives.
You may not need someone to be accountable to, and that’s fine, but you may need some support with being accountable to yourself – and either can be facilitated with the support of a good coach! It’s about more than what are your goals and the steps you are taking, it’s also about why are you choosing to do this, now, and for whom.
If answering any of the above questions has stuck a bit uncomfortably for you, please do get in touch, let’s see what we can figure out about how to manage accountability in the best way that works for you - kathryn@kbmindfulcoaching.com
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