... at least partly!
As a coach, I’m often helping my clients understand themselves a bit better: their needs, preferences, thoughts, feelings, perceptions, habits, behaviours etc with the objective of making positive progress and realising greater possibilities for themselves.
In my course, I’ve spoken about our own individual ‘bucket of needs’ and looked at the trusty old Maslow’s hierarchy of needs to see how our needs are, or aren’t, being met, and what this might mean for us as individuals and what we may be able to do about it. So when I recently came across Tony Robbins’ article on ‘the 6 human needs’, of course I was drawn in... just 6?! Are they the answer to everything?! I needed to know and thought I’d share it with you all too!
what are core human needs?
First of all, here are the needs we are talking about:
Certainty - knowing we can avoid pain, and gain pleasure
Variety - needing stimuli, change and the unknown
Significance - feeling unique, important, special or needed
Connection - feeling close or union with someone or something
Growth - expanding capacity, capability or understanding
Contribution - a sense of service, focus on helping, giving to and supporting others
These 6 human needs certainly make sense to me, I can identify my own preferences and priorities amongst them (some stronger than others) as I am sure you can too. Whether there are definitely just 6, I don’t know if I’m totally convinced on that just yet!
As well as needs, I often talk about ‘balance’ with my clients. I know a lot of people don’t like this term now, particularly as the concept of a ‘work/life balance’ being a myth has become a popular viewpoint. I think it’s about what those terms look like for you, and how you want it to be, that matters. What I like about what Tony Robbins says about the above needs, is that our behaviours are based on (I’d go with influenced by) the extent to which the needs are, or not, being met. But more than this, it is possible to be ‘over-meeting’ a need (that’s a technical term I just made up), causing an imbalance in your overall sense of wellbeing.
Consider the table above – which one(s) can you identify as your greatest, or primary need? For example, if you are drawn to connection, the chances are you are kind, loyal, and give your time willingly to friends and family. But if this need is ‘over-met’, can you edge into people-pleasing at the expense of your other needs?
Perhaps we can all use the table with a perspective of balance in mind to not only see if there are gaps in our overall needs (accounting for preferences of course, but might there be a need not being met), but also with the view that within just one need there may be an imbalance to address.
As with any model, they absolutely can be informative and useful but aren’t the beginning and the end of a much larger topic! I do think this concept of 6 human needs might be a helpful starting point to identify what is going on for you right now, and understanding you a bit better. It has definitely made me think, and I’d love to know what you think about it too.
You can access Tony Robbins’ full article here: https://www.tonyrobbins.com/mind-meaning/do-you-need-to-feel-significant/
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