As a life coach, it’ll come as no surprise to you that my wish is to help all my clients ‘live their life as well as they can’ – however that may look for them.
I also know that it sounds a bit vague and idealistic, but at its core I think it’s actually a beautifully simple message that we just might need some help to get to grips with to interpret what it means for each of us. Enter one perspective on living our lives well: ikigai.
What does ikigai mean?
In Japanese culture, ikigai translates as ‘reason for being’ – and we all have one, even if it requires a deep search of ourselves to find it. The consensus on ikigai is that it is concerned with meaning and purpose in our lives, consisting of 4 parts:
What you love (your passion)
What the world needs (your mission)
What you are good at (your vocation)
What you can get paid for (your profession)
This is often displayed via an image, like the one below:
Your sweet spot will inevitably be different to someone else’s – it’s not about status or wealth, it’s about what really matters to you (which as a life coach I love, and something I say all the time!)
Find your ikigai
There are different ways you can use this ikigai model to help you identify your ‘sweet spot’, such as brainstorming ideas in each of the 4 sections. Personally, I think it is easy to come unstuck and despondent with this concept when you feel under pressure to nail a single career for your working lifetime to hit that sweet spot in the middle. That’s unfair and unrealistic pressure!
A more beneficial and realistic perspective I believe is to think of it in terms of all the components in your life – your downtime, your relationships, your hobbies etc as well as your work. And, like most things I talk about, it doesn’t have to be static. I’ve spoken quite a lot before on ‘life chapters’ - circumstances change in our lives and we also respond and adapt to them, therefore a sweet spot set in stone is unlikely. The over-riding principles of your own unique ikigai, like values, are likely to remain more constant.
I also love this guidance from Ken Mogi, author of ‘the little book of Ikigai’ on 5 pillars to help you determine your sources of ikigai:
1) Start small (just like habits, going too big too soon can be unsustainable)
2) Accept yourself and avoid comparing to others (they aren’t you and their ikigai will not be yours!)
3) Harmony and sustainability - consider the impact of your actions and choices on those around you and the environment (not in a people-pleasing detriment to yourself perspective I hasten to add!)
4) Find joy in the little things (enough said!)
5) Try to be present (we spend a lot of time ruminating in the past or worrying about / planning for the future, meaning we can be missing out on the right now!)
There are so many sources of information on ikigai if you are interested to find out more, such as this one: https://inside.6q.io/guide-to-ikigai/ but I hope this overview has given some helpful insights and food for thought for now, and somewhere to start if you're keen to find your ikigai.
As ever, if you’d like some support in unravelling what this means for you and what you want to do in your life (to live it well!), please get in touch as I’d love to see if I can help. It’s my honest view that the accountability of talking through your wants is far more likely to bring changes to fruition than many exercises written in notebooks alone (and believe me, I’ve been there are done that!). Feel free to get in touch: kathryn@kbmindfulcoaching.com
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